[Maybe he needs to mention it in some way. To make it clearer to Juggler
that he has been trying, in a way that Juggler hasn't picked up on. It's
difficult to do that for either Gai or Juggler without sounding accusatory
or defensive. It's sure not simple. But maybe he does need to tell him
about it in some way.]
What kind of grand display are you thinking of? There might be some virtue
in something smaller?
You can't fix everything in one big gesture, as you know. I think the part
to put the most energy into has to be the part where it's meaningful,
whether it's big or small. Something that shows that you've been listening
to him, to what he's been telling you about how he feels. Something that
shows that you have a good understanding of his heart, and that you really
want to work with him to address the issues between you guys, because you
care about him.
If you don't want to do that, of course. If you don't want to spend time
with him, if you can't see benefit from it, that's up to you. It's your
prerogative, Gai.
I don't mean with any of this that he's flawless and all the mistakes have
been yours. You two would have to work together, to find the places in your
hearts that hurt, and help each other heal them.
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Date: 2019-09-21 08:45 am (UTC)[Maybe he needs to mention it in some way. To make it clearer to Juggler that he has been trying, in a way that Juggler hasn't picked up on. It's difficult to do that for either Gai or Juggler without sounding accusatory or defensive. It's sure not simple. But maybe he does need to tell him about it in some way.]
What kind of grand display are you thinking of? There might be some virtue in something smaller?
You can't fix everything in one big gesture, as you know. I think the part to put the most energy into has to be the part where it's meaningful, whether it's big or small. Something that shows that you've been listening to him, to what he's been telling you about how he feels. Something that shows that you have a good understanding of his heart, and that you really want to work with him to address the issues between you guys, because you care about him.
If you don't want to do that, of course. If you don't want to spend time with him, if you can't see benefit from it, that's up to you. It's your prerogative, Gai.
I don't mean with any of this that he's flawless and all the mistakes have been yours. You two would have to work together, to find the places in your hearts that hurt, and help each other heal them.